#4. Keep your ex-lover’s phone number on speed dial.

Two days ago, I finally decided I would no longer initiate contact with my ex-lover. I felt empowered. I felt free. I even felt kind of cool. Then yesterday, while I was walking home, I called her.

It was an accident. I meant to call my brother-in-law whom I had removed from speed dial several months ago to make room for her. So I pressed 4 and patiently waited while the phone rang. He wasn’t picking up, so in my mind I started composing the voice message I would leave. Voice mail picked up. It wasn’t my brother-in-law’s voice. It was hers.

I pulled the phone away from my ear in shock and promptly disconnected. All my best laid plans not to contact her were foiled by my phone and my stupidity. I hadn’t taken her number off speed dial. What’s worse is that I’d somehow totally forgotten I’d put it on speed dial in the first place. I felt deflated. I felt cretinous. I felt totally uncool. Then I started to laugh.  When I got to my house I did what I should have done weeks ago. I took her off speed dial and put my brother-in-law back.

And now, a day after my dumb deed, I am trying to just keep laughing.